Cross Roads

I realized last night that I am really bored. I work, come home and basically hang out lately. I am getting very addicted to this computer so much so, that I haven't read a book in a while.

I recently finished grad school, and for two whole years that kept me so busy. I had tons to read and write and spent one weekend a month in class. I loved the topics that I studied as they were so mind stretching and I felt so much passion about what I was learning.

It is a surprise to me to find that I am actually missing school. I am feeling like I need something else to replace it, but not sure what direction to go in. I am looking at some on-line classes that sound interesting, and I may explore them more carefully.

If I look deeper into my heart and listen more carefully to that quiet voice inside of me, there is a call to start a program or business of my own. I am not sure what it would exactly look like or how to go about it, I only know that there are ideas floating around my head and I think about them every day.

If I am going to make some changes, then I need to start soon, because life is going by pretty darn fast. I know that most people my age are thinking about retirement. As for me, I want to start something now that will bring me satisfaction and purpose as I go into retirement.

Maybe it is time for me to be still and start listening closer to that voice that is telling me I can do it.

Saturday night is all right

After I got my closet and room all organized, I made an appointment at the mall for a manicure. I am not much for getting my nails done, but decided that I could use the lift today. The manicurist is a very interesting woman. She came to American from Poland only 4 years ago and has learned English and settled into the American way of life. I loved relaxing while she did my nails and shared the challenges she and her family faced as they bravely came to a brand new country and began to make a new life for themselves. They made many sacrifices to come here and I admire people who have the courage to take that leap of faith for a better life.

After my nails were done, I decided to venture out into the mall and to my surprise it was all decked out for Christmas. The Hickory Farms Kiosk was all set up in its usual holiday spot and as I walked further I noticed that Santa was center court seeing the children. I don't remember Santa being at the mall this early when my kids were little, but hey that was years and years ago. I guess it is true that Christmas festivities start earlier every year.

My husband hates the mall so much that he pretty much refuses to go unless there is something he needs and it is the only place he can purchase it. I can't say I am a lover of malls, but sometimes when I am feeling isolated I enjoy going to the mall and walking around. I feel energized by the crowds of people (as long as there aren't massive crowds and long lines)and I find my mood is improved. Usually I run into at least one person I know, although I didn't see anyone familiar this evening.

I wondered around a little bit and started to think about Christmas shopping, knowing full well that I wouldn't actually start shopping until I am done with Thanksgiving. But it was still fun to look even though I didn't stay too long.

When I got home, my husband had dinner on the table. It is so great that he enjoys cooking because he is a really good cook. He is especially good at stir-frying. Tonight another chicken stir-fry with broccoli, onions, celery, carrots, mangoes, and cranberries on top of whole wheat pasta.

YUM-O

Week end wrap up

It is getting chilly out and it is the perfect weather for a nice big pot of home made chicken soup. I have been reading my new issue of The SUN magazine while my soup is boiling on the stove top. A whole chicken, diced tomatoes, celery, onion, carrots and oregano. And I have my water just starting to boil for the orzo.

I love to get a new issue of the The SUN magazine and love when it comes on a weekend when I have the time to sit and devour it. I first go to the correspondence, then flip past the articles deciding which one I will go back to first, and then straight to the Readers Write pages. Every issue there is a topic that readers are asked to write in on and they are always very moving and powerful. My intent on getting the magazine was to try to write in on a topic, but so far have not been disciplined enough to do so. This month the topic is Airports, and not being a traveler I didn't really have a story in me about them. Next month is Patriotism...hmmmm...maybe I will shoot for January's topic, Now or Never. I like that one the best.

Yesterday we went to see, Into the Wild at the movies. Sean Penn directed a brilliantly artistic movie with a compelling story. It is the from the book, Into the Wild, about Christopher Mccandless, a college graduate who gave up his money, family, and ties to society to live in the wild to find happiness and a deeper meaning of life. The movie was long, it sort of needed to be to tell the story. It wasn't the type of movie I had in mind for a rainy depressing kind of day that yesterday turned out to be, but it sure made me think and sparked much discussion in the house. I spent some time googling him today to find out more information, and read more articles about his journey. I mostly came away with how sorry I felt for his parents that they had no idea where he was for two years. In that respect what he did was so selfish, but who knows what was really going on in his mind.

It is Sunday and that means family day at my parents' house. My mother made her usual tomato sauce and pasta, but it was sweeter than ever today. She also made her famous chicken cutlets and salad. Both my sisters were there with their families and my aunt and it was a typical family Sunday dinner, and I so longed for it today.