Monday check-in

Saturday morning we spent up at my parents' house packing up all the stuff we were getting rid of from the house. We had a whole garage full of good stuff, furniture, kitchen stuff, clothes, linens, etc. It was so cold on Saturday and we were in and out of the house dragging stuff into the garage and clearing out the cellar. We had a two hour window of when the truck was coming which turned into a 3 hour window.

My siblings were there and our husbands and my niece. Mom stopped by, too. When we realized we would be there longer than planned, we decided to go and pick up Subway grinders and have some lunch. We sat around our dining room table the one where we have had all our Sunday dinners and had our lunch. The dining room table is the only piece of furniture left in the house. We toasted with our coke bottles thinking it may be the last meal we have around that table in that house.

It was good team work and a good feeling of accomplishment to get so much done. I had not been feeling well all morning so I was ready to go home when things were done and when I got home I was in full blown chills. I just got right into bed with my mattress pad heater turned way up and I was shivering and shaking. I slept most of the day and was up on and off in the night sick.

Spent the rest of the weekend resting and napping.

No work today due to winter break, which is a good thing. Not sure I would have made it in today. Feeling better, but I am so weak from not eating much over the weekend.

So hoping I will perk up today and get some stuff done around here and feel normal again!

Travels in the night

The family farm. View from the top of the hill, 1950.

Thursday night I had a dream that I was standing on top of the hill across the street from my parents' house overlooking the family farm as it was like when I was growing up. It was in the middle of the night and I was barefoot and in my nightgown. I had my camera and I was taking pictures of the farm in the dark, in the snow, well aware that I was standing on snow and it was not cold. I was thinking that this was my favorite place to be. It crossed my mind how I would get back down the long hill with no shoes and a bum knee, but the thought was fleeting.

I kept taking pictures and looking at them in the LCD screen. I had the ones all picked out that I was going to post on FB. Although I can only remember one of the photos now. I could see a silhouette of myself in the photo and wondered to myself how I could take the picture and be in it at the same time.

Then I woke up (or so I thought) in my old bedroom at my parents' house with the camera right next to my bed. I grabbed it looking for all the pictures. They were gone. My husband came in and I was telling him about the pictures as I frantically looked again and again through my digital photos. My husband told me I must have dreamed it all. But I knew it wasn't a dream. I took those pictures and they self destructed like a message from an episode of Mission Impossible.

I woke up (this time for real) in my own bed and I thought that it was a good idea to go up the hill and take pictures of the farm in the winter. In that moment my head cleared and I realized I had been dreaming and then I remembered how everything was gone now. The farm, the buildings, and the farmers.

I thought about my dream all day long, how empowering it felt to be standing up on that hill in the middle of the night and even though everything is gone in real time, it is still there in heart and soul and possibly in another dimension far away.

Getting closer

It is Tuesday night, my husband is at the radio station doing his show and I am listening while I blog. I like to listen on-line because the sound is so much better than on the radio.

He is playing some Mary Chapin Carpenter right now, Stones in the Road. I love that song.

My parents' home is just about renovated and our aim is to put it on the market by March 1. It makes me sad to think about selling it. Yet, I know picking up and moving there did not feel right either. So I am just going to go through this and cry when I feel like it and grieve its' loss.

I am thinking about having a little house blessing before we sell it. Maybe get my kids and my husband to go over there with me one night and just say good-bye to each and every room and share some memories.


I can't imagine never going to the house again and every time I think about it, I weep.

Preoccupied with weather

The roofs are collapsing all over our state. I hate watching the news, it is so scary. We received an automated call from our city encouraging all residents and business owners to shovel their roofs and to look out for cracks in ceilings. It is very unnerving all around.

Tomorrow a wintry mix is due and a big storm coming on Thursday. I know of 4 grown men who have slipped and fallen on the ice, one needing surgery for his injuries. There have been reports of professional roofers falling off roofs while cleaning them. The driving is still difficult as now the ice is falling from trees and power lines causing a scare as you are driving along.

Right now I am sitting in my kitchen with my cup of tea and just trying to relax and think about what to do this weekend. Tomorrow seems like another stay at home day catching up on house stuff.

I have not worked a full week for the past 3 weeks. We have never had a winter like this one and we still have a ways to go. Just trying to hang in there.

Breaking records

The snow fall around here is making headlines and headaches for all of the state. Many of our towns are calling for a state of emergency because they have run out of the snow plowing budget and can't keep up with the snow removal. Some parts of the state have piles 41 inches high. We have broken all records for snow fall in January at 4 feet and 11 inches. The most since 1945!! And there is a possible snow storm coming next week sometime! We have missed 5 days of school (some towns have missed a whole week)so far.

Driving around is like playing Russian Roulette, because when you come to a stop, the drifts are so high you can not see if anyone is coming. You need to inch your way out and can't see the oncoming traffic until your car is all the way out and then you are in danger of getting hit! It is very unnerving.

Everyone is pretty grumpy and just wishing the winter away and longing for spring. I am trying not to get so moody over it. We can't change what is so we just have to accept it. So I am making the best of these snow days. Yesterday, I totally organized my messiest kitchen cabinets. I am so happy with how easy I can find things today. That was worth a snow day to me. lol!

I am not able to shovel too much snow, so I am going out of my way to cook special meals and take on more chores inside to make up for it. I so appreciate my husband and my sons and how hard they are working to shovel us out.

I just had my first ever town emergency automated telephone call. When the phone rang and it gave the emergency prompt, it was a bit startling because I have never received a phone call like that and I was worried about what was happening. Sigh of relief that it was about the parking ban! Parking ban in effect until further notice. Most our our streets are plowed so that only one car can pass at a time, so those plow trucks still need to be out there plowing the streets to widen them.

Roofs and entire buildings are collapsing under the weight of the snow, so it can be a very dangerous situation. I am trying not to watch the news too much and just stay as mellow as I can as it does not look like this is going to be over for awhile!

Just another Wednesday night

We were all prepared for a snow storm to come in later this afternoon, so when it started at 10:00 A.M. we were all surprised. The snow came down steady and heavy and before we knew it, it was an early dismissal day. It let up by the time we were dismissed making the drive home easier than expected.

I headed straight home and settled into my kitchen and cooked up a storm. I made an eye of round roast,smothered with some Merlot and French onion soup. Potatoes and carrots on the side along with a green bean casserole. Delicious!

After supper we watched the first episode of MAD MEN. I found it hard watching the show because there was so much sexism, it was pushing my buttons! But it sure was indicative of the times as it takes place in 1960. One episode was enough for tonight and we will watch another tomorrow.

I took a break from the TV and then turned it back on to watch the last half hour of American Idol. I don't usually watch until they get down to the top 10, but of course I wanted to see how it was going with the new judges. I like them and it seems like it will be a good season, because the talent looks awesome.

Now I am listening to my Grooveshark account. I love the instant access to music. I should be in bed, but I am betting there will be no work tomorrow and staying up late listening to my music. The wind is howling out there, the snow is drifting, mixed in with an icy rain. Wondering if we will get any of that snow thunder I am hearing about on the news?

I have had so much time off due to the snow storms that I feel like I semi-retired! I like the feeling!

Dinner for two

Home for another snow day. Our 4th in 2 weeks! Lots of snow and ice hitting our state this year. But of all the snow storms, this one isn't dropping too much snow on us and seems to be winding down already. And most of all, the sun is now shining! Maybe we won't be shut in all day after all!

I had dinner last night with a friend from my home town. We weren't real close growing up, but in high school she dated the brother of my best friend and we got to know each other then. I have only run into her twice since graduation 40 years ago, but when I friended her on Facebook, I knew that she would be someone that I would want to connect with in person. Luckily she felt the same way.

There is something about being with someone from your childhood. Of course there are the memories, but being with someone who knows your history, your family and remembers events and people that you have long forgotten has a very healing effect on me. I was beside myself with happiness being with her last night.

She is now a widow, and she shared that very sad chapter of her life, but she seems to be moving forward and doing well.

We sat in the restaurant for 2 and a half hours and would have stayed longer if the place wasn't clearing out.

When she asked me how long I have been married, I told her it would be 36 years in May. She said she would give anything to be able to say that she had been married for so long. It made my eyes fill up with tears for her, and made me realize that as much as I try to appreciate each day, I am not as present as I want to be.

It was a good night for memories, to reconnect, to reflect, and just appreciate everything good in my life.