It has been many years since I have hair long enough to wear a ponytail. My hair has been short now for about 36 years. But I do remember what it used to feel like to wear a ponytail all day and then take it down and how my hair would feel like it was aching as I tried to get it to flatten out.
That is how my hair dresser described the feeling of my hair when it would start falling out. She said I would feel that achy feeling like when you take out a ponytail. It started on Saturday when I woke up, my hair was aching and I had a some strands of my hair on my hand. I had noticed a few strands coming out when I was brushing my hair during the week, but not much. In the past two days, more has fallen out.
I wonder if I should just shave it all off now, but a part of me wants to wait to see how it will happen. Maybe there is a part of me that thinks I will be spared total baldness. After all when my husband asked the nurse if there was going to be hair loss, she said there would be some thinning out of my hair. I said, "Really, everything I read said that I would lose my hair completely with the chemo I am getting." Then the nurse said, "Yes, you will lose it all." I wondered why she wasn't upfront and honest about the inevitable? Why would she not want to prepare me instead of out and out misleading me?
So I am waiting to see how long this will continue with my hair coming out strand by strand. I noticed my legs are completely hairless already. So no shaving legs for a while. I like how soft and smooth they look and feel right now, so that will be something to enjoy.
I don't want to be shedding and making a mess at work, so I will try to keep on top of this and make the decision to shave my head before too much is falling out all over the place.
Oh, the things that now occupy my mind now.
That is how my hair dresser described the feeling of my hair when it would start falling out. She said I would feel that achy feeling like when you take out a ponytail. It started on Saturday when I woke up, my hair was aching and I had a some strands of my hair on my hand. I had noticed a few strands coming out when I was brushing my hair during the week, but not much. In the past two days, more has fallen out.
I wonder if I should just shave it all off now, but a part of me wants to wait to see how it will happen. Maybe there is a part of me that thinks I will be spared total baldness. After all when my husband asked the nurse if there was going to be hair loss, she said there would be some thinning out of my hair. I said, "Really, everything I read said that I would lose my hair completely with the chemo I am getting." Then the nurse said, "Yes, you will lose it all." I wondered why she wasn't upfront and honest about the inevitable? Why would she not want to prepare me instead of out and out misleading me?
So I am waiting to see how long this will continue with my hair coming out strand by strand. I noticed my legs are completely hairless already. So no shaving legs for a while. I like how soft and smooth they look and feel right now, so that will be something to enjoy.
I don't want to be shedding and making a mess at work, so I will try to keep on top of this and make the decision to shave my head before too much is falling out all over the place.
Oh, the things that now occupy my mind now.
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6 comments:
I often wear my hair in a pony tail for work, so I know what you mean by it aching after taking it donwn, though I've never heard it described that way. While I've had a few friends go thru what you are now experiencing with the chemo, no one has shared much of the process or how it feels. I hope you can sense us holding you close in our hearts as you walk this journey. The good thing is that it does grow back, and that will be yet one more reason for celebration!
I'm mad at your GI doctor. How insensitive! Grrr.
I've never heard about a scalp aching when you lose hair. Let me know if that's true. One of those facts we never thought we'd have to know about.
I'm praying for good GI news for you.
Hi Lena! Great to stumble on your blog! Best of luck with everything! Have you heard of Freedom of Access to Medicines? The non-profit leading the effort against the FDA from disproving the drug Avastin on June 28, which is currently working for 17,500 women with Metastatic Breast Cancer! Please sign and share the urgent petition: http://fameds.org/petition.php
I am a pony-tail wannaebe. Have been all my life, but whenever I tried to grow out my my baby-fine fly-away hair, I didn't exactly get rave reviews. It will be interesting to see what your hair does when it grows back in. Some people with straight hair got curly hair when it grew back.
Hugs, thoughts, prayers--they're all for you as you walk this path.
just popped in to say Hi. If there was anything I could say to make you feel better I would but, being a man and having been bald for nearly forty years now all I can say is, what you are in your heart is really what counts. As one face answers another in the mirror so too does one man's heart answer another's.
God bless, love Geoff.
I have been out of the blog world for a long time and for some reason this morning something told me to check on another friend whos hubby is going through chemo. Then I saw your blog and decided to check up on you.
I am so sorry to read where life's journey has taken you right now Lena. That being said I have to say that I am happy to know that you have such a strong spiritual belief and I know you will find solace within that belief.
Know that I love you and am lifing you up in prayer for total peace, health, and well being.
In light and love,
Patty
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