Happy Birthday

It is my son's 28 birthday today. Over the weekend we took him out to dinner with his girlfriend and had a wonderful meal at Dakota. On Sunday, my mother had us all for dinner and we brought a birthday cake up for dessert and we all celebrated again. After dinner we watched a video of my sister's wedding. She was married 12 years ago on his 16th birthday. So it was fun to watch the video and see all the kids so young. We just had a fun family day, laughing and reminiscing.

Today I was thinking about the day he was born. He is my first born. When I went into the hospital everything was going along just fine. There was a woman in the room next to me that was having a breech birth and having a time of it. The staff was preparing the operating room for her because she was going to need a Cesarean birth.

Wouldn't you know that at the last minute, her baby turned around and she was able to deliver naturally, and I stopped dilating and my baby went into fetal distress. I was the one who ended up in the operating room to have the Cesarean birth!

Fortunately, all was well. A happy and healthy mom and baby boy. Seems like yesterday in so many ways.

Personal Growth

The book I had on reserve at the library came in. I am reading The Law of Attraction, by Esther and Jerry Hicks. Now this book is one of the books that The Secret is based on. Remember, Rhonda Byrne researched many books about the law of attraction and packaged it up and marketed it as The Secret. She is quite open about saying that these laws are ancient.

Over 20 years ago, I read a book called, Guiding Yourself to a Spiritual Reality which talked about the very same thing. Just at that time, Oprah wasn't as far a long in her spiritual journey (or not publicly) to have such topics on her show. Now we have Dr. Oz talking about "energy" on mainstream TV.

Actually, there are many books on the subject the laws of attraction and the movie and book, What The Bleep Do We Know talks about them as well. Now that the concepts are becoming mainstream, businesses are taking them on and there is more of an emphasis about attracting money and success, but the law is about so much more than that. It tells us that we attract things that we don't want to us as well. I find it fascinating and I have a couple of stories to blog about when I get time. I attracted a couple of situations in my life unconsciously, but in hind site I could see exactly how they evolved.

It was about 28 years ago when I started doing a great deal of personal growth work. Reading, journaling, energy rings, women's groups. Sometimes I feel I should be much farther along, but in many ways I know that I didn't always want to grow even though I was doing the work. Does that make sense? Sometimes it was just plain easier to fall back into old habits and patterns and fit in with the mainstream. I never mentioned a word of my experieces to my family, who would not have understood. Only a couple of my friends knew what I was up to in my spare time, but for the most part it was not discussed, because there was no interest on their parts. Now they are all reading The Secret and it makes me chuckle to myself.

When Oprah began to have people like Gary Zukav, Bernie Siegel, M. Scott Peck on her show, I was beside myself with happiness as these were people I was so very interested in and had rare opportunities to see in person. A shift was happening as Oprah was starting her own journey and people were open to listening because she was so beloved and respected. She brought on Maryanne Williamson and she was the first one to pray on a national talk show program. Now she shares her Course in Miracles on the radio. So much as come around!

A lot of this is on my mind today, because of a dream I had last night of a therapist telling me that she was going to help me get the cancer out of me by asking me to stand outside and hold up signs to the cars passing by. I have no idea what the signs said, because I think I woke up before I had the chance to do it. But if I had to guess what those signs were to say, I think they would say that I have no more secrets and I refuse to hide what I believe to be true for myself and my journey.

This and That

After hearing so much about the movie, Juno from my son and on the TV talk shows, I went to see it on Monday. I found it to be very enjoyable. The film tackled a difficult subject with a great deal of heart. I also enjoyed the music from The Moldy Peaches. There was a minute there when I thought the movie was going to take a trashy turn, but it didn't and I was grateful for that. Next, I would like to go and see Atonement.

I am settled back into the work week after a nice three day weekend. I am still trying to find a venue for a big presentation we are supposed to put on in April and I am not having any luck as of yet. Tomorrow I will hit the phones and not stop until I find a place!

I was supposed to go to a friend's house last night and play Nintendo Wii. My friend is just dying to show me. I ended up canceling due to a threat of snow, and a couple other things. My son thought it a riot that I had a video game date with a friend. I didn't telling him that she was also bringing her 80 year old mother! Well, we will reschedule at some point.

Tom Rush

When we were up in Vermont, we decided to go to the local high school to see a concert performed by Tom Rush. Anyone remember him? He is a folk singer from my era and has been performing for 45 years. He was the very first one to perform Joni Mitchell music and first recorded Circle Game, on an album of the same name. He also was the first one to record Jackson Browne and James Taylor songs.

The auditorium was packed and filled with baby boomers, Tom was in fine form and very funny! We had a really nice time.

At his CD table, Tom was selling a DVD called Festival Express that was filmed in 1970 when he was on tour with the the Grateful Dead, The Band, Janis Joplin, Ian and Sylvia,etc. What a line up, huh? They spent 10 days traveling across Canada on a train stopping off for their concerts.

The DVD was released only last year due to legal issues. According to the husband, who is the folk music guru in our house, it is a better done film than Festival, which is a film on the Newport Folk Festivals during their hay day.

Who Goes There?

We went with my sister this weekend to her home up in Vermont. Neighbors have claimed that bears are living in the woods behind her back yard, but she has never seen them, nor any evidence of them.

When I looked out of the back window, I saw these tracks on her deck right up by the back door. Sure looks like bear tracks to me. It was creepy to think they come right up to the house like that. I kept a look out, but never saw them, and I was OK with that!

LJ

When I walked through the doors of our grocery store the other day, a feeling came over me that I was going to run into someone special. I made my way straight to the salad bar and as I was sprinkling my salad with dressing, I looked up and saw my son's ex-girlfriend standing right at the end of the counter pouring soup into a carry out container.

Just last week, my son and I had been talking about her and I said that I was surprised that since they broke that I have never run into her.

So it was very ironic to run into her after her name came up so recently and it was such a chilling(in a good way) feeling to have that premonition of running into someone when I walked into the store, even though I didn't know exactly who it would be.

When I looked up and saw her standing there, I said hello to her and she immediately came over to me and hugged me hello. It was really nice to see her, and we had a chance to catch up.

It's not that I wanted them to get back together, not at all, it was just great having her around so much at the time and my being the only female in the house, I really enjoyed her company. It was a little loss when they parted.

It has been about three years now and they have touched base with one another a few times over the years, so they had a friendly split. They both have matured and moved on and that is a good thing.

It was a very nice surprise in the middle of the work day to run into her and reminince about some of the fun family times we shared. I was also glad that she seemed to be happy to run into me as well.

It was a little joy for the day!

Making Pie

It's not far I can walk

Down the block To TableTalk

Close my eyes

Make the pies all day

Plastic cap

On my hair

I used to mind

Now I don't care

I used to mind

Now I don't care

Cause I'm gray

Did I show you this picture of my nephew

Taken at his big birthday surprise

At my sister's house last Sunday

This is Monday and I'm making pies

I'm making pies

Making pies

Pies

Thursday nights I go and type

Down at the church For Father Mike

It gets me out

And he ain't hard to like

At all

Jesus stares at me

In my chair

With his big blue eyes

And his honey brown hair

And he's looking at me

Way up there

On the wall

Did I show you this picture of my sweetheart

Taken of us before the war

Of the Greek and his Italian girl

One Sunday at the shore

We tied our ribbons to the fire escape

They were taken by the birds

Who flew home to the country

As the bombs rained on the world

5am

Here I am

Walking the block

To TableTalk

You could cry or die

Or just make pies all day

I'm making pies

Making pies

Making pies

Making pies

by Patty Griffin

Snow Day

A snow day today! It sure is nice having a 3 day weekend. I am trying to get to all the things I let slide over the past couple of days.

The snow storm did not develop into the big storm that they predicted. It is actually quite warm outside, and the snow that was supposed to last until midnight stopped late morning. So we were pretty lucky, we have just enough snow so it is pretty out and it is easy to shovel, but not so much to cause big disruptions all over the state.

My son goes back to college tomorrow, so it was nice to have the day home with him today to hang out help him pack. He has to go back an extra week early due to a training he has to attend.

Tonight we are taking him out to dinner on a gift card that I received for RuthChris Steak House. He has never been there and is excited about going.

It is always a bit of a bummer when he leaves to go back to school, he has been fun to have around and not to mention how helpful he has been. But they grow up and go off and have their own lives, just like they are supposed to!

A Course in Miracles

I heard on TV that Marianne Williamson was going to be teaching A Course in Miracles on XM radio this year. The course has 365 lessons and she was going to do one lesson a day. I bought the book many years ago, but found it very hard to practice on my own. I have looked around for a study group over the years, but never seemed to find a convenient one, so I just didn't follow through.

Although I was very interested in tuning in and following the course, I did not want to have another monthly expense added to our budget by having to get XM radio. I was disappointed, but let it go.

I found out yesterday, through a blogger buddy that on Oprah.com they have have all of Marianne's lessons posted and that I didn't have to have the expense of signing up for XM radio! I was very happy to learn this. So last night I dug out my Course in Miracles book and today I was able to start at lesson 1.

It is interesting that just before Christmas I was on the Internet looking for some type of new personal growth course and had a few things in mind, but I was debating because of the costs involved, and I wasn't sure what I wanted to commit to.

After the holidays, when I was reading Eat, Pray, Love, I was yearning to par take in more of the spiritual pursuits that I have slacked off on. My interest was rekindled for a while when I was taking my grad courses in Holistic Thinking, but since I finished with that, I was getting lazy again about doing anything on my own. I felt called to get myself on track while I was reading that book, and I think that is why it meant so much to me.

And then yesterday I find out that I can have it all at my finger tips on the computer, on Oprah.com for free and I have a blogger buddy who is also interested in taking the journey. It all works out, doesn't it?

So now I have my new year's resolution; to work on obtaining inner peace.

Mangia!

It is Sunday. It is the day we visit my elderly parents and have a typical Italian pasta dinner with many of my family members. When we walk in the house and smell the sauce simmering on the stove it just whets all of our appetites!

Today she also made bracoile, which is my non-Italian husband's favorite dish.

She makes her bracoile with hamburger meat and adds ham and cheese and rolls it like a jelly roll, browns it and then cooks it in the sauce.

My mother always serves up pasta in a yellow pyrex bowl. The bowl sure seems like it has been around for a long time. I asked my mom today how old it is, and she said that the bowl is 60 years old! Boy oh boy, I am so careful when I hand wash it now, as I don't want to be the one to break a family heirloom!

It has been a good work week. We have been so busy these last few months that I haven't been able to get to any of my on -going projects. I have been reading records galore and processing placements non-stop, which has been a good thing for our programs. But for now things have slowed down some and I can actually breathe when I am there and start working on more creative projects like writing newsletters and planning another presentation. I will share details about the presentation when I get it firmed up, but I have a lot of leg work to do for now.

Yesterday I had another Feldenkrais session and I also scheduled a massage for right after my lesson, since she is also my massage therapist. So an hour and a half of body work, was just a great thing all around. I went floating out of her office as happy as a clam!

I don't know why I am staying up so late tonight, I sure will be sorry tomorrow. Thank goodness it is Friday! On Fridays we donate money to charity and we can wear jeans for the day. I look forward to that all week.

Media

I finally saw the clip the media is making a fuss about because Hilary appears to be crying. It is so sickening to me that the media is jumping all over that and making it a bad thing that a human being has emotions. If we wanted a president without any emotions we could build a freaking robot to do the job. I remember feeling the same way about Senator Muskie, back in 1972, as well.

A former governor of Maine, Muskie was elected to the U.S. Senate in 1958 and served until 1980. In 1972 he ran for president against the Republican incumbent, Nixon. He withdrew from the 1972 race early on, after it was perceived that he had wept while defending his wife.

It happens to all of us, doesn't it? You are having a conversation and talking rather matter of fact, when all of a sudden the emotion creeps up and for an instant it takes your breath away, and you find you are having difficulty speaking without tears. It is unpredictable, uncontrollable, and somewhat uncomfortable even if you are in a therapist's office.

It is a beautiful and healing experience because that only happens to us when we speak a truth that is rising up from the bottom of our hearts. Only the media can jump onto an honest to goodness human moment and make it seem like a catastrophe.

I am not even on the Hilary bandwagon, I just feel so angry when I see the media twisting and turning and looking for every angle to destroy credibility, when the particular incident has no bearing on credentials or abilities.

I know there are millions of examples, but this one is upsetting, because it is so dysfunctional to perpetuate that notion that it is weak to cry or show emotion, when just the opposite is true. We need our emotions now more than ever before in order to become a healthy and whole society.

Friday Post

When I started this blog, I had no idea exactly what it would be like in the blogosphere. Now almost a year later, my blogger friends were praying for my family member. That is a beautiful thing. Thank you all for your prayers.

My aunt is still in the recovery room, and said to be doing well. Just one concern about her blood pressure, but they are keeping a close eye. I hope to see her tomorrow.

I went to my Feldenkrais lesson the other day. I am moving much better and in turn feeling better in general. My instructor had on her MBT shoes and had me try them on. Wow, they did feel good and it was weird the way you can rock back and forth on them. She said a few of her clients have them and they are all raving about them and how they don't suffer from leg and knee pain any longer. MBT = Masai Barefoot Technology. The shoes are supposed to improve your posture and actually work your muscles and take some of the stress off of your joints. She was highly recommending them to me. I am going to look into them. I know they are very expensive, but if they help that much, then they are worth it!

My aunt had her surgery today. She is in intensive care and the next 24 hours they will be watching her very closely, but they said she did well with the surgery. My sister was able to get up to the hospital to see her and my aunt opened her eyes a couple of times, at least she knows on some level that family was there for her.

Back to work

I was a bit apprehensive about getting back into the swing of work after being off for the holiday break, but it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Everyone dreads that first day back after vacation, no way to get through it but dive in and pick right back up from where you left off. I just had to spend some time remembering where I left off!!

My aunt was scheduled today for her heart surgery and they told her this morning that they needed to post pone it until tomorrow. I felt badly for her because it is another day she has to worry about it. As of now, she doesn't even have a time for tomorrow, so I hope that they don't put it off again. Thank you for keeping her in your prayers.

A new year

A very dreary and rainy day today, but since yesterday was so crisp and sunny, I will let it pass.

We spent the day at home today, mostly putting away our Christmas decorations, and waiting for Tucker to get picked up. Then off to the grocery store. The mad rush of the holidays is surely all gone as evident by the nearly empty meat cases, and the store so quiet I kept looking around to see if there were other customers. It made me sad in way, but I was able to get what I needed and quickly get out.

My aunt is having open heart surgery tomorrow. I just got off of the phone with her to wish her luck and let her know we will all be praying for her. She seemed in good spirits today.

Tomorrow back to work. I have enjoyed this time off so much. I had a nice balance of doing things for myself, organizing the house and seeing friends and family. Who could ask for more?

Our son is traveling back home today and we are anxious for him to arrive. He is on a bus to NYC right now and will catch a train home. We will be picking him up later, and hoping that the roads won't be icing up by the time we have to go and get him.

It is still early, supper dishes are all done and I am going to go and make lunch for tomorrow and hope to sleep well and get a good day's work in tomorrow!